Steve Clifford

An example: Trump reveals his Health Care plan. His six-part Trumpcare DIY (Do It Yourself) program will replace Medicare and Medicaid, saving $1.9 billion while improving health care.

Yesterday, Trump announced the renaming of eight agencies. “As with the Department of War, the new names will clarify the agency’s mission, improve morale, and make them more assertive and goal-driven."

I decided to enrich American discourse by introducing needed words that the English language lacks.

Canada constantly sends us cold air. A tariff on cold fronts would change this. Send us balmy weather or pay up.

Like many men, I ignore instructions on newly purchased items. After buying a 45-piece tricycle kit, I would immediately start to screw pieces together. “Why are the tires on the handlebars?” my wife will ask.

These Republican expectations are based on the scientifically proven interaction of Trickle Down prosperity and the theory of Advanced Voodoo Economics.

Leavitt: "The President said it. Therefore, it’s common sense and above the law."

No one can lie like Trump. Trump will abolish the entire concept of truth. I have several duplicity name thoughts — for boys, Mendacious, DuPlicit, and Falisfyfire. For girls, Perfidious, Prevaricature. Farbricature.

In Dumpty v. King’s Horses Et. Al., Humpty sued for medical malpractice including misdiagnosis, surgical errors, administration of improper medications, premature discharge, and failure to recognize multiple fractures. The jury awarded Dumpty $36.7 million.

The obvious explanation was that these six Pike Market stores were conspiring against me. That is why I threatened them with a tariff.