Steve Clifford

"Groenlandia, Gaza, e Canada" (Composed by Lee Greenwood, Libretto by Carl Ichan). This opera, set in the future, depicts how America regained it moxie, due to a perceptive, upstanding, unflinching, illustrious, resplendent, and fearless leader.

"I will be a social media influencer. It’s easy money. Last year Kylie Jenner averaged $2,386,000 per post,” I told my dubious wife..

Is the right answer to my promotion exam, Deep State Transgenders, or Illegal War-Mongering Ukrainian Immigrants?

Celebrate good news. Every morning ask Alexa how many airplanes landed safely at SeaTac yesterday.

An investigative team at Fortune published a bombshell: THE DEPARTMENT OF WASTE DOES NOT EXIST. Neither did the Departments of Fraud and Abuse, which have never existed.

Regarding nominees for Assistant Secretary of the Navy, Trump stated, “These are Big Men. The WAVES will love them.”

My reasoning: Asked what qualities they desired in in a President, the top choices for women and non-straight white males were: judgement, intelligence, leadership, empathy. Straight white men chose: knowledge of NFL rules; laughs at fart jokes.

JD Vance warned that that stolen pet restaurants could drive other fast food chains out of business. “My private equity friends in Silicon Valley are raising billions of dollars to invest in this industry.”

I use cutting edge technology and mnemonic methods to compensate for age-appropriate memory loss.

"My lies are good lies. I lie to preserve democracy. Trump’s lies are bad lies."