Hey Baby – Hot 4U Wants 2B Your Friend!

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“I must be aging well,” I told my wife.

“Why do you say that?” she asked.

A lot of attractive younger woman want to be my friend.

How do you know?

They send me friend requests on Facebook

Are these women you know?

No. They probably saw my photo on Facebook. Age makes some men look very distinguished. I am probably one of them.

Are these women from Seattle?

No. Most of them are foreign. Apparently, my appeal is global.

Why do you think they asked to become friends?

They could be lonely. In their countries it may be difficult for beautiful women to meet men. Occasionally I post my blogs on Facebook. Maybe these women read one and want to connect with such a wise and erudite commentator.

Name a few countries where beautiful women have trouble meeting men.

Andorra, Liechtenstein, and San Marino.

Very funny. Don’t you realize these requests are scams??

Are you implying that “Major Hottie” is a scammer?

Who is MH?

She is a stunning young woman. She’s somewhat flirtatious but I assume that is simply part of part of her exotic culture and surging libido.  She wants to meet me but can’t afford to travel to America.

You would be to her the same fool you are in America. Scammers match provocative photos with made up names. If you respond, they will first infect your computer with malware and steal your identity and financial information. Then they will try romance scams, loan scams, lottery scams, and crypto currency scams.

These women asked to be my friend. I don’t want to appear inconsiderate by not responding.

They didn’t choose you. An algorithm selected you. An algorithm looking for gullible vain men approaching senility. These women do not exist.

Ready 4 U does not exist?

Who?

4 U Is quite attractive and wears very revealing clothes. I guess that is part of her culture.

Sorry, but 4 U does exist.

Does the cryptocurrency investment opportunity that she was so excited about also not exist?

It exists. It just will never pay off. But go ahead, you fool, and answer.

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Steve Clifford, the former CEO of KING Broadcasting, has written humor for Crosscut.com and the Huffington Post. He is the author of "The CEO Pay Machine."

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