On the Contrary — It takes Courage to be a Moderate

I want to add a few additional thoughts on moderation. I am prompted to do so, at least in part, because when I recently wrote another piece on this topic in Post Alley, most of the respondents were scornful of centrism as wishy-washy, indecisive, even cowardly. “Nothing in the middle of the road but a yellow line,” and so on.

I would say that is true of what I call “peace-mongers,” who are people in leadership roles who will do anything to avoid conflict. As Edwin Friedman observed, “At the head of every dysfunctional organization is a ‘peace-monger.’” But to suggest that being a moderate or centrist is necessarily wishy-washy or cowardly is just wrong. In fact, it takes great courage to be a moderate, or to be what I argued for in that article, “a feisty centrist.”

Here’s part of what I quoted from Mounk, “On both economic and cultural issues, most Americans have views that are both moderate and reasonable. Those views don’t merely amount to splitting the difference between the current positions of Democrats and Republicans; they are a principled expression of moderation.” (emphasis added.) I emphasized “principled expression of moderation” because true and wise moderation is rooted in principle, and not in conflict avoidance or covering your ass.

Just now one relevant principle is pluralism, the idea that life in a free society means living and working things out with people who see things differently than you do. These days many on the right and at least some on the left don’t accept such diversity or pluralism. They believe that those who see things differently than they do must be demonized, cast out, even eliminated. In short, no pluralism, only victory for our (righteous) side. That’s the pathway to authoritarianism and to totalitarianism. And that is what is at stake in America today.

One of the most articulate defenders of moderation was the late Rabbi Norman Lamm, onetime the President of Yeshiva University. Lamm wrote the following: “Moderation should never be confused with indecisiveness. On the contrary, a lack of self-confidence in one’s most basic commitments is often expressed in extremism. Only one who is sure of what he stands for can afford to be moderate. A strong heart can risk being an open heart.” I love that.

An image for that openness is that of the spelunker, a person who digs exploring underground caves. A spelunker ties his/her rope to a fixed point outside the cave, puts the rope around their waist and then goes into the dark. Having a fixed point allows exploration. Just so: “self-confidence in one’s most basic commitments” allows us to be open to people and ideas that are different than our own.

I would add that given the number of questions, issues, and topics coming at any of us these days, it seems to me unreasonable to expect everyone to either know about every issue or have a settled mind on it. The only way you manage that is by accepting, hook, line and sinker, one ideology or another. By definition an ideology explains everything. (Some, yes, turn religion into an ideology. But faith is, in part, knowing that you don’t know.)

Sometimes, often really, it’s okay to not know. And it’s okay to be ambivalent. Between noisy and simplistic extremes, ambivalence may at times be the high moral ground. Life is complex. Important questions and issues are hard and complicated.

Sometimes we need to extend the grace to others — and to ourselves — of allowing time, consideration, not-knowing, and ambivalence. I fear the ideologues who know with certainty on every topic, person, issue, or question. I also fear and am repulsed by the way we have come to classify and assign people to one box or another.

No! People are mysterious, maddening, complex, inconsistent, marvelous, and surprising. If moderation is rooted in principle, and it is, one of those principles is it’s okay, at times, to say, “I don’t know.”

A friend suggests that on many of life’s most important matters and big questions, we are wise to have three figurative boxes available to us. One is marked, “Accept.” The second, “Reject.” And the third is “Awaiting Further Light.” Part of moderation and of wisdom, is allowing others and ourselves the “awaiting further light” option.