Holy Florida Congressman, Batman!


Image by TyrusTime from Pixabay

DC Comics is suing Rep. Matt Gaetz for $1.3 billion for copyright violations. “Matt Gaetz constructed his entire persona from personality traits plagiarized from nine DC Comic supervillains — The Joker, Sinestro, Two-Face, Lex Luthor, Deathstroke, Ra’s al Ghul, The Duke of Deception, Darkseid, and Harley Quinn,” the suit alleges. 

“Consider Gaetz’s contrived, counterfeit smile. He stole that directly from The Joker. Look at them side by side. The same maniacal face. The same evil grin,” said a spokesperson for Warner Brothers, the owner of DC Comics. “Our official website states: The Joker’s crimes require no motivation other than his sadistic desire to show people the meaninglessness of life through pain and death, and the narcissism to see the world remade in his own image.”

“This is an exact description of Matt Gaetz’s demeanor. He stole it all from The Joker.” 

The suit claims that “Gates aped Brainiac’s psychopathic depravity, Sinestro’s fascistic megalomania, and Two-Face’s schizoid criminality. Gaetz pilfered his inflexible, metallic hair style, along with his malicious vindictiveness from Ra’s al Ghul, and his loathsome narcissism from Deathstroke. From Lex Luthor, Gaetz gleaned how to be a demagogic and egotistical politician. From Duke of Deception, Gaetz acquired the arts of mendacity and deceit,” said Chauncy Billum, an attorney working for Warner Brothers. 

“However, Darkseid and Harley Quinn are the supervillains from whom Gaetz took the most. Darkseid is a heartless, thoroughly evil monster who believes that his worldview is the only valid one; he seeks to destroy all opposition and to control the minds and will of his subjects,” attorney Billum continued. “Finding his Darkseid in Donald Trump, Gaetz worked to become his obsequious sidekick. Here, he modeled his behavior on Harley Quinn, The Joker’s sidekick. Even though The Joker framed her for a crime and tried to kill her, she remained a loyal sycophant to her master. And Gaetz also replicated Harley Quinn’s wanton lust.” 

“It is obvious that every aspect of Gaetz’s identity, thoughts, and actions infringe on DC Comics copyrights,” Billum concluded.

Lawyers for Rep. Gaetz responded, “The suit has little merit, only between half a cup and a quart of merit. Gaetz’s lawyers promised to mount a “spiritless and lethargic” defense. “Frankly, we don’t see big fees in this one,” they added. “At best, we could bill 75 hours for associates to research facts that everybody already knows.” 

Steve Clifford
Steve Clifford
Steve Clifford, the former CEO of KING Broadcasting, has written humor for Crosscut.com and the Huffington Post. He is the author of "The CEO Pay Machine."


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